Hello my friend; it has been three weeks since we interacted on this platform. The idea was never to neglect you but to focus on myself.
I believe you agree that self-love is not selfish, hey!
I had to pause and reflect after a series of some challenges I personally went through. It was at that point that I reaffirmed to myself that we are our own mountains to conquer irrespective of what happens in our lives and how that comes about.
Let me start by asking the question.
How many times have you heard people or even yourself stating that “I know myself”, no one will tell me anything?
In most cases when this is said, it is not with a smile and a soothing voice. It is usually stated in a harsh, aggressive tone that communicates defensiveness. The defensive response comes from nothing other than shielding and masking the holes in your life.
If you continue to avoid confronting the holes, you will fill them with anger, regret and self-pity until they become a mountain impossible to surmount. Our challenges reflect ourselves to us and we can only handle them effectively if we have a better understanding of who we are.
For me, the answer lies in personal mastery. I like the definition by Peter Senge which states that “personal mastery is a set of specific principles and practices that enables a person to learn, create a personal vision and view the world objectively”
What I derive from this definition is that, in order to operate effectively in this dynamic world, to meet and exceed your goals, you need to master yourself. The challenges I went through would have eaten me for breakfast had my level of personal mastery been poor.
It is for this reason that I would like to briefly share with you some critical pillars to mastering yourself so that you can navigate and bring together the different pieces of this puzzle called life:
– Date yourself: I’m certain that you had countless meetings with friends and business partners in the last week or a few months back. All good and well, however let me ask, when last did you have a date with you? This is an opportunity to set aside the challenges that you are going through and reflect on what it is that you value. It is an opportunity to ask why you do what you do in the first place. It is about focusing on your strengths and weaknesses. It is about re-assessing the decisions you have to take about your life. This will reveal or deepen your self-awareness and help you achieve your goals.
– Revisit your vision: Self awareness reveals you to you and informs you about what is meaningful in your life. It creates the opportunity to revisit the mental picture of the future that you want. Without this vision, you will be blown like a paper every time there is a storm in your life.
– Adopt workable behaviours: How you conduct yourself and interact with others is an indication of the level of personal mastery you have achieved. It is like in project management, you need to know what is in scope and what is out of scope as far as your behaviour is concerned. You will not unnecessarily chop and change what is important to you because of what you are going through. Instead, you will uphold what is constructive and essential for the future you desire.
– Review, practice, reflect: This is a continuous pattern of learning to open your mind to new skills and new ideas. You will not be scared by new circumstances because your mind would have opened up to new perspectives.
Remember, in the words of Sir Edmund Hillary, “it is not the mountains we conquer, but ourselves”
Think Big, Dream Wild & Prosper
Tex Hlalele is a life and business coach and inspirational speaker. He is the author of the book, Face The Person In The Mirror. Book coaching and speaking engagements by calling +27 64 6566174 or visit http://bit.ly/dreamsmadepossible